


Affliction of the Heart

by SaCrEd_bOaT



Category: Harry Potter - J. K. Rowling
Genre: F/M, Fluff, Slow Burn
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2021-02-28
Updated: 2021-03-07
Packaged: 2021-03-12 13:40:53
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence, Major Character Death
Chapters: 3
Words: 6,669
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/29760471
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/SaCrEd_bOaT/pseuds/SaCrEd_bOaT
Summary: severus snape x reader // slow burnThe story begins as you arrive at your 6th year at Hogwarts. This story is written as a (y/n) x snape, but the backstory of (y/n) is my (o/c).Alex is also my (o/c). This story will have NSFW, but I'll give a warning before hand.
Relationships: Severus Snape/Reader
Kudos: 11





	1. Chapter 1

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I just realized that the format wasn't transferring over. The thoughts are supposed to be italicized, but I think I got all of them.

_"(y/n)... are you in there?" you heard your fathers thick drawl speak from the other side of the door. "I'm sorry I yelled at you in front of your mom. I shouldn't have... I'm such a bad dad, it's my fault you are the way that you are. I should have fought your mother on letting your uncle take you to that stupid school."_

_You refused to answer him. Sliding your hand to the waistband of your pants to feel the wand hidden on you for safety. Whether that be for your own safety to avoid your fathers short temper or maybe as a reminder that there was always something more to you than your family._

_The door slams open and you see your father looming over you in the doorway --_

Your eyes shoot open and you gasp lightly. You were on the Hogwarts Express now, safe from your fathers dark eyes. Reaching into your robes you feel around for your wand to reassure it was still there. 

"Are you alright, (y/n)?" Fred asks you from the seat in front of you with a worried look on his face.

"Oh. Yes, I'm fine." You said looking between the twins with a convincing smile. You didn't want anyone to worry about you, let alone your close friends. The summer had been rough to say the least, leaving you with nightmares and too many secrets to count. However, this year, you were safe at Hogwarts away from your family. You were determined to learn more on your own this year, particularly Occlumency. A summer full of your mother using her Legilimens on you to see what you were hiding, to try and convince you to join the Dark Lord for when he came back. You were scared of going back, especially if this were to continue. You had found a book on occlumency in a library over the summer and stole it. Hiding it until you could take it to Hogwarts and practice safely without anyone finding out. 

"We're almost at Hogwarts (y/n). You looked really tired so we let you sleep.", George said while crossing his legs that were propped up on your seat.

"Oh, thanks guys. Do I really look that bad?"

"Absolutely awful-" Fred teased you with a smirk on his face until George hit his shoulder. His face dropped and he corrected himself, "You look fine. We were just busy trying to figure out why the train stopped."

Your eyes tore from the window and refocused on the boys, "What do you mean the train stopped? It's not like we can pick anyone up.." 

"The train stopped, and it got really cold. I'm sure Ron knows what it was about. He always seems to be getting in trouble with Harry and Hermione" He says shaking his head.

You scoff, "Like you're one to talk."

"Excuse me love? I'm a perfect angel." Fred said while looking over to George and getting a mischievous look on his face. "Oh. I almost forgot. I have an extra chocolate frog, would you like it?"

"Absolutely not! But give it to me, I'll go give it to Harry! That little bastard deserves a little prank here and there." You said while standing and stretching your legs. He hands you the boxed frog with a smirk and reaches up to open the door for you.

You walk down the hall looking into each carriage for Harry and his gang of friends. After a little while of walking and nervously picking at the cardboard on the box you finally see Ron's red hair through the glass window. You knock on the glass and open the door, not waiting for a response. 

"(Y/N)!", you Hermione borderline shout as you sit on the bench beside Harry. 

"As much as I love being reminded of my name. I would like to ask why you three look like you've seen a ghost?" you grinned as you looked over at Harry, "And for you my dear sir, I've brought gifts!" 

You shove the chocolate frog into his hand and look to Hermione for answers. 

"There was a Dementor! It was in this long black coat, and it made everyone so depressed when it came. And it nearly killed Harry! Professor Lupin saved him!! He just stood up and saved him!", she said nearly out of breath by the time she finished.

I looked over at Harry with his glasses perched on his nose. He didn't deserve to be pranked after all of that. As much as he annoyed me with his arrogance, he didn't deserve any of this. I frowned and took the box out of his hands. "As much as I don't want to, I'm gonna take this back to the twins so they can give it to a different, and more deserving victim. Promise I'll buy you something to make up for it."

"Don't worry about it (y/n). I'm not really hungry anyways." he said frowning lightly.

I ruffled his hair and looked back to Hermione, "So tell me about this new Professor. You said it was Professor Lupin, right?"

"Yes, Professor Lupin. It's R.J. Lupin, right up there on his suitcase." 

"And where is he? Did he just leave after casting out the Dementor?" You said while sitting up straight suddenly feeling uncomfortable. You remembered your mother talking about the Order. A group fighting against the Death Eaters, and you were sure you had heard Lupins name before. 

"He left to talk to the train conductor." she turned to see the door open and a tall man stepped in. He put you on edge. You weren't sure why, but his presence made you anxious. You felt a thin bead of sweat cascade down your back. You gripped your hands tightly together and crossed your legs over each other.

"I apologize for that taking so long. He said the dementor came to check if Sirius Black was on the train." Yet another name that made your stomach drop. _You're safe (y/n). You're safe at Hogwarts. You're parents are hundreds of miles away, and Hogwarts is no less than a fortress against those who aren't supposed to be there. Especially your death eater mother. She had moved to America after the fall of Voldemort and met your father, whom was a pureblood but was taught magic by his parents rather than at school._

"Did the dementor get you too?" Professor Lupin looked at you with a grin on his face. "You're looking a little pale."

"No sir, I'm fine. I'm going to head back to the boys now to make sure they didn't do anything to my stuff." You said looking the three staring at the both of you. 

He grabbed your wrist lightly before you made it out the door. "Wait, just a second" he dropped your wrist from his grip when you looked from his hand up to him, "here's some chocolate. It'll help you feel a little better." he had a look of concern on his face as he handed you a small bar.

"Thank you." you said looking up at him, just now noticing the scars across his face. However, they didn't distort his face like some scars. These scars blended with his skin and made him more handsome then you thought before. _Christ, what is my problem with finding older men attractive._

"It's no problem at all. I'm Professor Lupin, I'll be the new Defense Against the Dark Arts Professor." he said reaching out to shake my hand.

You looked down at his hand, briefly deciding if you should even shake his hand. _I'm an asshole, but I probably shouldn't make my first impression as a prude._ You grabbed his hand and shook it. 

"I'm (y/n) Bulstrode. I'm a 6th year." your hand dropped to your side as you became more comfortable. _Whomever this man is, he couldn't be too terrible. Could he?_

"Bulstrode? I feel I may know your father.." He said with a look you couldn't decipher.

"Doubtful, her fathers an American." Harry said from your side, "We'll see you at the Sorting Ceremony (y/n)?"

"Of course. I'll see you three in a little bit." you watched as Professor Lupin sat down and you walked out of the small carriage and walked back to where you originally were seated.

You sat down in your seat and handed the chocolate frog back to Fred. He gave you a confused look but didn't question your decision. You two were close, but with you being older there was still a gap of trust. You had always been closer to Fred than you were with George. After hard exams or hard weeks of studying, the three of you would sneak into a room together and drink away some of your stress. This wasn't always the greatest idea, but it had started last year and you made sure that neither of the boys drank too much or put themselves in any danger. Now you were soon to be 17 and sometimes regretted sneaking in the fire whiskey with the twins.

You felt the train beginning to slow and you looked out the window to see you had arrived at Hogwarts.

=================================================

You slipped your hands into your robe pockets and looked around the Great Hall for your friends. Your eyes finally landed onto your curly brown haired best friend, Alexander Gotland. _What a loser, sitting by himself not talking to anyone. Couldn't be me._ You thought, then laughed a little out loud. You knew that before you met Alex your third year, you were the Ravenclaw left sitting at the table not talking to anyone because all of your friends were in other houses. Of course, you talked a little to everyone if they addressed you first, but you were never one to start a conversation with someone that you weren't close to.

You took long strides and plopped down beside him and bumped your elbow against him. He turned to you first confused then a wide smile took over his face. It was like a breath of fresh air to see him again. He grabbed you and gave you a hug.

"I missed you (y/n)! You never wrote me back you arse!" he said to you as he let you go hesitantly.

"I'm sorry, I couldn't return the letters. I was crazy busy this summer." you said hoping he wouldn't see through your lie. Well, it wasn't exactly a lie. You were busy, just not with anything he could find out about.

"Well I'll have to catch you up then!" He said, then he began spouting what sounded like nonsense to you about his favorite players on Quidditch teams and how he has been scouting players from other schools teams that he thinks might go professional. Soon the rest of the students had sat down and Headmaster Dumbledore began his speech. Your eyes flickered through the teachers finally landing on Professor Lupins who was also looking back at you. You quickly looked back to Dumbledore and pretended to listen to what he was saying. You felt your cheeks heat up and suddenly felt nervous about this year. _Yes, you were safe, but what if you weren't smart enough to pass your N.E.W.T.S._ These thoughts were quickly interrupted by an applause which you joined in on, to then realize that Dumbledore must have introduced Professor Lupin. You looked back up to him seeing him standing and taking a small bow. You tried to avert your eyes and scanned through the professors again seeing Professor Snape with a small scowl on his face. _I wonder if he feels the same way I do about this man._ Snape's eyes dart up quickly and look at you, almost like he could feel your gaze. He raised an eyebrow and you shook your head lightly and turned in your seat.

Professor Snape and you weren't close per say. You just happened to have a better relationship with the dark, and stoic Professor than most students. And for good reason. You had been one of his top students, asking for help after class when you didn't understand the material, and even joining Advanced Potions club after Alexander convinced you to join. He loved Potions class. You on the other hand could live without it. You always had to put in more effort than other students to understand the material, but you never knew why. It just never seemed to click as easily as it did for other students. You could remember ingredients, and what the potions were supposed to look like, along with the steps if you went over them several times to memorize them. Yet, the actual potion making was always harder for you. Alexander always made fun of you for this, constantly saying, "It's all in the wrist (y/n)". To this you cracked a smile and would reply with, "I'll show you what's in my wrist!" and would smack him in the back of the head.

A parchment paper was dropped in front of you by one of the many owls flying above, and you looked at it to see your schedule for the year. You had done really well on your O.W.L. exam and had quite a few options to chose for what you wanted your N.E.W.T. level classes to be. You had talked to Professor Flitwick about focusing on Charms, Defense Against the Dark Arts, and Potions. He said he would keep that in mind when picking.

"What does your schedule look like?" Alex said from beside you and looked over at your schedule.

He read aloud:

"Monday, Wednesday, and Friday: Transfiguration 1st block, Potions 2nd block, and Defense Against the Dark Arts.

Tuesday you have Charms, Astronomy, and Herbology. Lucky.

Thursday you have Care of Magical Creatures, Divination, and History of Magic."

He scoffed as he looked back at his paper.

"We only have Potions, DADA, and Herbology together." he frowned lightly.

"Oh god forbid you're not stuck up my ass 24/7. I'll still be here Alex. That means we have class together everyday except Thursday. I'll make sure not to eat with you on Thursday." You said rubbing his shoulder so he knew you were just joking.

"Thanks love, but I will be okay. I was only kidding." He said with a grin as he bumped shoulders with you.

The food appeared on the table and we began to dig in. You didn't realize how much you missed the food at Hogwarts. At home, the food seemed very processed and disgusting compared to here. 

After you ate, you checked on Harry like you said you would, then sat by Fred and George for a little bit before you went back to your dorm and unpacked your belongings.


	2. Chapter 2

//TW// Thoughts of past abuse + panic attack

It was early Friday morning, you heard someone shuffle beside you, so you opened your eyes to see who it was. You saw one of your roommates packing her school bag and preparing her items for the day.

"Hey, what time is it Eileen?" you asked her in a whisper.

She looked to her wrist watch, "It half past 6. Breakfast should have just started. If you leave now, you might make it out before the rush of people come in later."

"Thank you, I'll just have to do that. I'll see you in Potions class." you said while sliding out from under your blanket. You quickly changed clothes and got ready for the day. It was 6:45 by the time you were throwing your robe on and walking out of the room.

You always loved the quiet walks in the morning and late at night when you would sneak out of your dorms and up to one of the empty towers. Being friends with the Weasley twins definitely had its perks. Especially by giving you the opportunity to find secret passageways to avoid getting caught by professors roaming the halls. You had gotten caught a few times, but almost always managed to use your quick wit to avoid getting detention or losing too many house points.

You finally arrived in the great hall and looked around for your friends. Fred and George were sitting beside Alex, and they seemed to be sharing schedules.

You sat to the right of Alex with Fred and George on the other side of table.

"Why are you boys looking at each others schedules if you aren't even in the same year?" you asked with a tired look. You really needed to get some coffee. You had slept terrible, plagued with nightmares of the Dark Lord making you join the Death Eaters and he branded you with the dark mark.

"We just wanted to see what Alexander is studying this year. Plus we knew you were going to be here soon and we couldn't miss talking to you!" said George.

"Oh wonderful." you said sarcastically. You grabbed a mug of coffee and picked at your food. You still weren't very hungry but you tried to eat at least two slices of French toast. The nightmares you had last night left you feeling nauseous, and filled with guilt. You hadn't actually joined them, but it felt so real. There was still a lingering tingle on your arm from where the dark mark was in your nightmare.

"We're thinking of throwing a little party Saturday night to celebrate the new year" he whispered to me. He looked left and right to make sure no professors were nearby. "I stole some fire whiskey from Charlie when he visited, there's enough for the four of us."

You took a sip of your hot coffee, burning your tongue on it but continued to sip it. You shook your head then laughed, "Fine, but if we get caught I'm 100% blaming you for bringing the fire whiskey."

"Deal." Fred said reaching out to shake your hand.

"Wait! No! That's not fair." George exclaimed.

"It's too late Georgie, a deals a deal." You said shaking Fred's hand.

The boys left the table and went to go sit at the Gryffindor table. You turned to look at Alex who currently was stuffing his face with French toast and was dipping a scone into a puddle of gravy on his plate.

"You're a pig." you said beginning to laugh at him, "how many did you eat before I got here?"

"Sixh or sevuh" he said with a full mouth.

"That's so gross, please chew. You're going to choke."

He swallowed his food and took a sip of his pumpkin juice. "Nothing that I'm not used to."

You exploded with laughter, missing the banter between you and your best friend. "I'm sure you've had worse." you said with a wink.

"Speaking of choking. Did you see the new DADA professor yesterday? He is hot as fuck. Merlin, I'd let him do whatever he wants to me." he said looking up at the Professors table then back to you. "Are you ready for class today? It's going to take me a few days to get back into the groove of things, but I think I'll be right back to where I was last year."

You thought for a moment. Today you had DADA with the new professor, hopefully he was actually competent unlike the last few professors. But you also had Charms with Flitwick and Potions with Snape at the end of the day. Nothing you couldn't handle.

"Merlin Alex! What middle-aged man do you not want to rail you?! I'm surprised you never got with ole' Gilly Lockhart." you said taking another warm sip of your coffee. Your plate was cleared and you began getting up from your seat as Alex took a few more bites of his food and stood to leave as well.

"I hate Lockhart and you know that. Such a prude, arrogant, idiot. He deserved that spell backfiring and erasing his memory." He said suddenly his mood turning bitter.

"Alex, I know he was an ass, and yes he did deserve that. But don't you think you might hate him a little more because we had to take our exams on HIM rather than the actual material we would have learned with any other professor?" you asked with an accusing glance.

"Obviously." he said while striding out of the hall beside you.

"I have charms first, so I'll meet you after lunch in DADA?"

He nodded his head and walked into the Ravenclaw common room. "How do you feel about the thing with Fred and George on Saturday? I didn't really want to go, but I don't want to leave you with them alone."

"You can trust them Alex. Yeah, they've played their fair share of pranks on the both of us, but they're good people." you said while walking towards your dorm.

"I'll just have to trust you on that (y/n). See you in class!" he shouted from his doorway with a small smile on his face.

After taking a quick visit to your dorm to grab your stuff, you made your way to charms class which went pretty smoothly. All you did was go over the syllabus for the upcoming year, and do some review on spells that you and your classmates had trouble with in the previous years. After class you ate lunch at the Gryffindor table then headed to the library to look for more books on Occlumency. You had one that you had began to look over last night, but that wasn't enough. You ended up finding a book on the history of legilimency and another on the practicality of occlumency. You checked these out then headed to class so you wouldn't be late. You could always start these in between DADA and Potions.

With the books tucked underneath your arm, you began the walk to the DADA classroom.

_Your mother would kill you if she found out what you are trying to do. Trying to defy the family, to go against the dark lord. She wouldn't hesitate to use the Avada Kadvra curse on you if given the chance. But she couldn't risk the ministry finding out and sending her to Azkaban. She'd have to wait until Voldemort was back. Then she could finally get rid of you._

You shook your head and felt a small lump in your throat. _Dwelling on it will do nothing. If it is to happen, it will._ You turned the corner quickly and slammed into someone going the opposite direction. Quick hands steadied you before you fell, but you dropped both books on the floor. _Son of a bitch, that's so embarrassing._

You looked up to see Professor Snape with a grimace on his face. You ignored it and reached down to grab your books from the floor.

"Watch where you. Are. Going. Ms. (y/n)" his eyes flickered down to your books then back up to your eyes.

"I'm sorry Professor. It won't happen again." you said, your voice cracked and it made you cringe. You would have been fine if you were having a better day. If your thoughts weren't so focused elsewhere.

He snatched the Occlumency book from your hand and flipped it over to read the title. He gave a slight hum then handed it back to you and walked away.

_Prick._

You finally made it to DADA only barely making it in time before the bell rang. You scanned the rows of students until your eyes landed on Alex, but you noticed there wasn't a seat open on either side of him. You frowned and walked to the front row, which had the only open seat in the room. You'll have to start coming early so you can get a better seat further away from the front of the class room. As much as you loved to be able to actually see the board, you did not want to be that close to the new professor.

"Welcome to Defense Against the Dark Arts! I am Professor Lupin and I'll be taking over teaching each and every one of you this year. Today we will start with something small, something that you should have learned in your previous years. Perhaps last year? Have any of you heard of a Boggart?" He asked the class while striding to the front board and writing his name in cursive on the chalkboard.

A few heads nodded and a girl spoke from behind you, "It's a nonbeing. It feeds on your fear, but they can be banished with a simple Riddickulus. Muggles also refer to them as the boogieman."

"Exactly! So I'd like all of you to try this with me. Get in a line in front of the cupboard here. Together we will practice the defense against Boggarts. Say it with me class. Riddikulus."

The class practiced the spell together a few times, then he spoke again.

"Are there any volunteers to go first?" Professor Lupin asked the class with a small smile. His eyes scanned the students standing in front of the cupboard until they landed on you. You shook your head and a wide grin spread across his face. "Ms. Bulstrode, since there are no volunteers, I would like you to go first."

You contemplated telling him off, but he was your professor after all.

"Sounds great professor." you said while walking to the front of the line. A few laughs could be heard from behind you. "I always love exposing my greatest fear in front of my classmates." you said sarcastically.

He dry laughed for a split second then looked down at you then back up at the class, "Now remember class. The boggart is sitting in the cupboard. In the Dark. It hasn't assumed a form yet. It does not yet know what will frighten the person on the other side of the door. Nobody knows what a boggart looks like when he is alone, but when I let him out, he will immediately become whatever each of us most fears."

Your eyes never left the cupboard. You had no idea what the boggart may take form as. But you did not want to do this here. Not in front of the entire class. It was humiliating. You took a deep breath as you recited the spell in your mind. _I've done this before. I can do it again. Just this time, in front of everybody._ Professor Lupin clasped a hand over your shoulder and leaned down to your ear. "You can do this (y/n). I know its scary, but I'm confident you can do this and it'll give the rest of the class some confidence." _Well that's reassuring._

He stood back up straight and took a step away from you to open the doors. You took a deep breath as your mother appeared in front of you and began to talk, "You need to join-".

"Riddikulus!", you said the spell a little louder then probably necessary and she began tap dancing with a top hat and a cane causing the class to burst out in laughter. _Even if they never knew who she is, they still find this hilarious._ You stepped away and noticed Lupins eyes on you, but as soon as you noticed, he looked away and smiled at the next student, beginning to repeat the process. You grabbed your bag and books and slipped out of the class without anyone noticing. You felt bile rise in your throat and your thoughts began to feel overwhelming.

You drifted through the halls trying to find a safe spot to ground yourself and try to keep your thoughts at bay. But they always seemed to break through. 'Weak walls' as your mother called it. Walls she could easily break through and become a parasite in your mind.

You passed your common room.

_You'll never be any different from them (y/n)._

Your hand began to tingle and you soon realized you were hyperventilating and tears were welling up in your eyes. You climbed the stairs to one of the empty towers in the castle.

_They'll finally convince you one day to join them and you'll never be able to show your face. If you don't join them. They're going to kill you. They're going to slaughter you just like they killed your uncle. No. He's not.. they didn't kill him. He's just gone. An empty carcass of who he used to be. You're best friend. Your confidant. Disappeared, and all they left was an angry slave to the Dark Lord, void of all emotion. He had no idea who you were. You didn't know how they did it, and it took everything in you not to ask for help. It hurt too much to talk about. Everything hurt too much._

Eventually the bell rang, bringing you down to earth. You felt awful. You had a raging headache, and you were sure you looked just as bad as you felt. You quickly fixed your hair which seemed to have gotten wet strands stuck to the side of your face. You fixed your robes and walked down to your dorm, took a quick shower and drank a glass of cold water.

_I really don't want to go to Potions class like this, but Professor Snape would kill me if I missed his first class. Maybe he has some calming draught that I can take before class. Worse case he says no and calls me a 'Dunderhead' or some other name._

You walk down do the dungeons and pull your robes around you. It always seemed to be damp and cold in the dungeons, no matter the season outside. You fixed your strap on your bag and knocked on the large wooden door of the potions classroom. It was around ten minutes before class and you hoped that Professor Snape was still in his classroom.

The door swept open in front of you and Snape loomed over you.

_Your father slammed open the bathroom door standing over you and grabbing your shoulders and shoving you into the wall. "Do you know what your mother does to me?" he yelled in your face. "This is your fault. She's pressured me into joining his group, and because you have yet to join. She's threatening me if I can't get you under control. She says its my duty-" he pulled out his wand from his pocket. "This is your doing-"_

You're snapped out of your thoughts as Professor Snape clears his throat and steps to the side to let you into the room. "You're ten minutes early. You're never early for class." he said with a raised eyebrow, not hiding his eyes scanning over your body.

"I was wondering if you had any calming draught or if I could make any after class. If not, that's fine." you said looking down at his shoes.

He sighed and walked into his office for a moment, then you heard glass being clinked around.

"Well come here. I don't have all day." he said from his office.

"Sorry, didn't get the invite." you said sarcastically once you entered his office. You had been in it before and it hadn't seemed to change. It wasn't a cramped room, but it wasn't huge. There were bookshelves that lined two walls, then the other two walls were lined with shelves of potions and potion ingredients neatly organized and cleaned.

"Do you want it or not?" he said with an annoyed tone.

"Yes sir." he reached out to give you the vial and your fingers lightly brushed against his when he handed it to you. "Thank you."

"Take it before the rest of your classmates get here. I don't want them interrupting my class with questions about why you need a calming draught. I'll want to talk to you after class, so don't forget. Now go sit down." He said pushing you lightly on your back towards your desk. You could feel the warmth coming off of him.

You walked towards your normal seat and set your stuff down and drank the contents of the vial. Snape walked by your seat and grabbed the vial off of your desk and walked back into his office.


	3. Chapter 3

Students began to slowly file into the classroom and Alex sat beside you at your table. 

"Why did you leave class early? You're lucky Professor Lupin didn't notice you ditching out." he said beginning to unpack stuff from his bag.

"I felt sick, so I went to the bathroom then just laid down in the dorm until class was over."

"Was it because of your boggart? Who was that anyways?" He finally settled and moved on his seat to look you over. A look of concern washed over him, "Are you okay? You look a little pale."

"Yes, I'm fine. What was your boggart anyways?" you said hoping he would drop the subject.

"It was my brother, he was dead. A lot of people's boggart was You-Know-Who, not surprisingly."

"I'm not surprised. I'd be scared of someone with no nose too, if I was them." you said laughing lightly. "Merlin, that's awful."

"Yes. You are (y/n)." he said laughing.

Professor Snape strode in front of the class and began to talk about the upcoming year and what he expects from us. It was very similar to what you heard every year on the first day so you ended up becoming bored and eventually zoned out. Thanks to the calming draught you just took, your mind drifted to happier memories of the summer. 

_Your hands gripped the leather steering wheel of your uncles 76' z28 Camaro. You could feel the power of the car beneath you, feel the rumbling of the engine through the seat. You loved the sound the engine made when you put some weight into the pedal and took off down the long stretch of road. Your uncle sat beside you with his arm on the car door. He looked so happy in this moment. This was maybe three weeks before his memory was obliviated, or at least that is part of what you assumed happened. You could remember the feeling of the air whipping your hair around in all different directions and the low hum of the radio._

You felt a light jab to your leg and looked over at Alex sitting beside you. He was staring in front of you towards the board. _What the hell is his problem._ You looked back up to the board to see Snape looking at you expectantly. 

"I know you're a _dunderhead_ , but this is an easy question. I'll only repeat myself once. What is the ingredient Syrup of Hellebore used for?"

 _Oh shit._ Your mind blanked for a second then you remembered, "It's used in the Volubilis Potion, and in the Draught of Peace."

"Correct. Now remember, this ingredient can be poisonous, so you need to be careful when preparing it." he continued to talk about this, then moved onto other topics.

The end of class came soon enough and you were glad to go eat dinner until you remembered you had to stay after class to talk to Professor Snape. _Fuck._

"Hey Alex. Professor Snape wanted to talk to me after class, probably about starting the potions club again or something, so don't wait up for me at dinner. I'll be there right after." you said while he packed up his stuff to leave. 

He nodded and patted your back, "Sounds good to me!" 

All the remaining students left the room leaving only you and Professor Snape. He walked over to your table which you still sat at, and pulled up a stool to sit down. You were nervous because you weren't entirely sure what he wanted to talk to you about, but you were really hoping it was only going to be about clubs.

"Are you still interested in continuing the Advanced Potions club?" He asked. His hands folded on the table and he began to trace the pads of his fingers. You looked up from the table to look at him.

"Yes, of course. I still believe Alexander is interested as well. I can check with a few of the students in the class to see if they would like to join, if you would like me to." you said finally relaxing under his stare.

"Very well." he pulled out a piece of parchment from the inside of his robe. He slid the paper in front of you and your eyes scanned over the words at the top of the paper. 

"What's this for?" you asked him after reading a short list of potions you have never even thought to attempt.

He sighed lightly, from what you assumed was from annoyance. "It's the curriculum for the club. You will be in charge of choosing which potion to prepare and learn, and I'm hoping to have you teach a few of these to your fellow students. Flitwick informed me that you were on track to become a potions master?"

Your impulsive thoughts immediately went to the dark mark you saw on your arm in your dream the previous night. You wondered briefly if you would even live long enough to pursue a career. You quickly pushed these thoughts aside and took a breath. "Yes, but I haven't decided what I want to do after school yet. I'm hopeful to become an apprentice for a few years, but after that I'm not confident in what I want to do."

He looked at you with furrowed eyebrows, "You still have time to decide. I wouldn't worry too much about it." 

"Thank you Professor." you said sliding the parchment back towards him, "Is that all you wanted to talk about?"

"Yes, you can go. Make sure you get something to eat. It'll help you feel better." he said as he stood up from the stool and clasped his hands behind his back.

You stood up, gathered your stuff and went to the great hall for dinner. It was packed. You had only been a few minutes late, so the meal had just begun. You found your way over to Alex and sat down across from him. 

"Did it go well?" He asked wiping his mouth on his sleeve.

"He wanted to talk about Potions club. He just showed me some ideas for what we would learn this year." you said picking some rolls off of the table and drinking from your glass of water. "How did your day go?" 

"It went pretty well actually! I'm really excited for this year (y/n)!" He smiled and put his hand on your arm, "and you're sure that you're okay? We can always go blow off some steam on the quidditch pitch after dinner. The team doesn't start practice for a few weeks, so no one should be there." 

You placed your hand over his and smiled lightly. "I'm just going to go to bed and rest. I'm feeling pretty tired after today."

"That's okay too!" He let go of your arm and began eating again.

You sat in a comfortable silence between the two of you and ate some of your food. You looked around and caught Harry Potters eye. He was staring at you but quickly looked away over to Ron. He and Ron began talking, Ron then looked up at you which resulted in Harry to smack him. _Great. So they were talking about you._ You gave them a look of confusion then rolled your eyes. You finished the rest of your meal and looked over to see Alex still was chowing down on his meal.

"I'm going to go to bed. I'll see you tomorrow." You said ruffling his hair as you stood up.

"See ya (y/n)!"

You walked back to your dorms, enjoying the light breeze you felt bringing in the warm air from outside.


End file.
